Tuesday, July 7, 2009

I'm So Bored

I'm so, so, so, so, so, so, so bored right now. Like, seriously! I need to go back to school so I can have something to blog about...arg. Well, for the most part, the only thing I'm doing right now is hanging out on YouTube and going to swim team practice at six in the morning...arrrrggg....

I'm singing for old people tomorrow at my friend Lexie's church, though!!!! XD

Friday, July 3, 2009

Random Speedpaints

Lately I have become obsessed with the art of Speedpainting!!! ^_^ Only, mine always turn out bad quality.

'nuff sed.

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Obsessions vs. Fears

Have you ever had an obsession? I most definately have.
What about fear? What do you fear?
...
That's what I'm going to blog about right now.

Obsession- The domination of one's thoughts or feelings by a persistent image, desire...etc.

Fear- A thought or emotion caused by impending danger; whether the threat is real or imagined

(dictionary.com)

So, fear and obsession are two very different things, yet they all come together in very similar ways in people's minds.

Let me give you an example from personal experience. You see, I have a huge fear of rejection and failure. Because of those either irrational or rational fears (depending on who you ask), I have slowly become obsessed with perfection in particular fields.

Some of the things I'm deathly afraid of are having a deformed baby (I'm not going to lie to you, but, if I had one, I could imagine loving it...once I got out of depression), becoming malformed because of a bad accident (can you read between the lines and see the common theme already?), and entering a huge competition and losing because of one slip up that was completely my fault.

Yes, one of my many obsessions is outer beauty. Being an artist, anything without artistic merit is very ugly to me. But, I think of artistic merit as more along the lines of the effort put into something to make it beautiful...whether or not the end result actually is...is less important to me.

One of the many ways to get to my heart is trying hard. If someone is as ugly as heck, but they try really hard to be presentable at school (taking care of their skin, washing their hair...etc) then they are more likely to be thought beautiful by me than someone with natural beauty who doesn't take care of themselves.

Make sense?

Well, that's all for today. Hope you enjoyed. Yes...I can be serious sometimes. (^_^)

Frustrations

I'm seriously frustrated with myself right now....

Why? Well, I made a comepletely new blog coz I though I'd lost the password to this one. But as it turns out, I remembered the password. Of course I did. -_-

Anyway, I'm on Liam's forum, and chatting with him on AIM. It's...fun? I'm also sorta talking with Jason on the forum. ^_^

My life is boring. I know. =_=